Feeling overwhelmed, overstimulated, and touched out as a mom? Here’s how to regulate your nervous system and reset—backed by therapy tools and lived experience.
Motherhood is hands-on—literally. You’re changing diapers, wiping noses, breastfeeding, carrying toddlers, and somehow still expected to be emotionally available, regulated, and responsive. But what happens when your body says “enough” before your mind can catch up? That’s where “touched out” begins—and triggers tend to follow close behind.
As a mom of 3 (soon to be 4) and a licensed therapist, I’ve been there. Here’s how I regulate my own nervous system in those moments—and what might help you too.
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What Does It Mean to Be “Touched Out”?
It’s a real, valid sensory and emotional experience where your nervous system feels overstimulated by physical contact—often from little ones who need a lot from you. Pair that with noise, mess, and mental load? You’re a walking overload.
Regulation Tools for the Triggered, Touched-Out Mom:
1. Step Away (Even for 60 Seconds)
If it’s safe to do so, remove yourself from the environment—even if it’s just to go into the bathroom and breathe. Ground your feet, place a hand on your chest, and remind your body you’re safe.
“I’m safe. This isn’t an emergency. I can come back to calm.”
2. Use Cold or Pressure
Splash cold water on your face, hold a frozen washcloth, or try a weighted blanket when you can. Cold and pressure can help regulate the vagus nerve, a key player in calming your nervous system.
This weighted lap blanket is perfect for alleviating stress and promoting relaxation. Bonus.. can also be used for kids!
3. Anchor to the Present Moment
Find five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear… you know the drill. It seems simple, but orienting your senses can snap you out of the flood of stress.
4. Switch the Input
Noise is a huge part of sensory overwhelm. Try noise-canceling headphones, calming music, or even giving yourself permission to turn off all sound for a few minutes.
These sleek, comfortable earplugs are designed to reduce ambient noise without completely blocking sound, making them ideal for moms who need a moment of calm without total silence. They’re discreet and perfect for daily use.
5. Name the Need (Without Shame)
“I’m feeling overstimulated.” “I’m craving stillness.” “I need to be alone for 10 minutes.”—Naming your experience reduces its power over you. It also helps you communicate needs to your partner or support system.
6. Create a “Safe Reset Ritual”
Designate one or two go-to actions that help your body reset: sipping tea in a quiet corner, journaling, stepping outside barefoot, or doing a breathing pattern like 4-7-8.
You’re not a bad mom for needing space. You’re a human with limits. And honoring those limits—even when it’s messy—is an act of love for both you and your kids.
Save this post. Send it to your partner. Bookmark it for the days you want to scream but still show up with softness.
You’re doing better than you think, mama.
Messy Minds & Motherhood 